10 tips para elegir vivir más alto el año. Por el Rabino Alejandro Avruj

Rabino-Alejandro-Avruj-
Rabino-Alejandro-Avruj-
1. Elegí una cosa para hacer que siempre quisiste hacer, y que no hiciste.

Por falta de tiempo, o de coraje. Por lo que dirían otros, porque es una locura. Porque no es para mí, o porque algún día lo haré y ese día nunca llega. Este año hacelo. Quizá sea un viaje, una aventura. Una noche de romance, encontrarte con esa persona, o ponerte a estudiar. Salir a solas con tu hijo, o invitar a tomar algo a tu viejo.

En Pirkei Avot, Hilel dice: “No digas cuando tenga tiempo voy a estudiar, porque quizá nunca vas a tener ese tiempo”. Gastamos tiempo en tantas cosas que ya ni recordamos que una buena inversión este año será vivir algo de lo que nos debemos.

2. Elegí una cosa para dejar de hacer.

Eso que sabés que no va más. Eso que hasta a vos te molesta. Dejalo ir. El tono en la discusión, la cantidad de malas palabras por frase, el querer controlarlo todo, el no estar presente mientras estás ahí, el silencio cuando tenés que decir lo que sentís. La adicción al trabajo, o al celular, o a los hidratos. O eso que no te deja tiempo para hacer lo que estás dejando siempre para después. El hablar más que escuchar, el dudar más que hacer, el esperar más que soñar, o el hacerse el superado en vez de amar mejor.

Johannes Brahms, el compositor alemán decía: “Componer no es difícil, lo complicado es dejar caer bajo la mesa las notas superfluas.” Dejá atrás esas notas, esas que no te permiten ser una gran canción.

3. Elegí qué cosas recordar.

La memoria juega un juego difícil. Solemos olvidar justo lo que era tan importante e imprescindible recordar. Mientras que eso que queremos olvidar, vuelve siempre…una y otra y otra vez. Saber olvidar es un don. Pero es tan difícil. Obsesionarnos en olvidar algo, sólo trae una y otra vez ese rostro.

Podemos tomar a broma como dice Groucho Marx: “Nunca olvido una cara, pero con la suya voy a hacer una excepción”. Pero es tal como dice Borges: “Sólo una cosa no hay, y es el olvido”. Por eso este año debiéramos invertir en elegir qué y cómo recordar. Porque si saber olvidar es un don, aprender a recordar es un arte.

Desperdiciamos la mayor parte del tiempo en discusiones, reuniones y acumulación de stress que no recordaremos una semana después. Sin embargo, guardamos en la memoria instantes que pasaron hace 20 o 30 años, con cada detalle, por lo verdaderamente sagrado de ese encuentro.

Elegí hoy qué recordar mañana. Trabajá en buscar momentos de grandeza, instantes de inspiración, de esos que sabes que vas a guardar para siempre.

4. Elegí ser joven.

Tenemos una edad biológica. Y otra edad histórica. Y otra según cómo decidamos mirar al mundo.

Dice Frank Kafka: “La juventud es feliz porque tiene la capacidad de ver la belleza. Cualquiera que conserve la capacidad de ver la belleza jamás envejece”. En la capacidad de ver la belleza está la ansiada fórmula de la eterna juventud.

Ser sabio en el mirar. Mirar, pero con belleza, lo que viene. Lo que nos llueve en la vida.

La vista es un sentido sesgado, recortado y fácil de engañar. Mirar más profundo exige alineamiento emocional y convicción de espíritu. Mirar la belleza apela a la empatía con el contexto, a la búsqueda del sentido de las cosas, y a definiciones acerca de qué es ser rico y qué es no serlo. Llama a evitar que lo primero que salga sea un “no”, a reírse más seguido y a abrazar y decir cosas lindas al oído. A sorprender y nunca perder la capacidad de asombro, a besar más largo, a salir a caminar con el viento en contra, a compartir con otros la tarde que se dé, y a abrir la mano mirando a los ojos con una sonrisa en la esquina del que espera. A renacer desde la tristeza, y a volver a creer desde la angustia y la soledad.

Dice el Rabi Menajem Mendl de Kotz: “Está prohibido envejecer. La gente envejece en plena juventud. La frescura es más importante que la devoción. Cuanto más frío, más viejo. Lo joven es el calor y el entusiasmo”.

Aquél que logra ver la belleza logrará ser joven para siempre.

5. Elegí las Apps del celular que vas a dar de baja.

Hay una App mejor que la otra. Pero calculá cuánto tiempo te quita estar metido en cada una, en vez de conectarte con tiempos para el espíritu, para la familia, los amigos, para el silencio, para pensar, para lo creativo, o simplemente para vos. Si podés sacar del celular Apps como el Gmail o el Facebook y verlos a la noche un rato en la compu en casa, elegís estar conectado con tu día.

La hiperconexión nos hace estar superdesconectados.

6. Elegí perdonar.

Hay veces que confundimos perdón con justicia. Y no alcanzamos a dimensionar el inmenso poder sanador del perdón. No nos permitimos perdonar por miedo a olvidar, o acaso a pensar que lo que nos hicieron tenía alguna justificación.

El dolor que nos hayan causado es real. Se llega a sentir infinito. Fue justo esa persona que no tenía que ser, con la que compartiste tanto y de repente es un extraño. O a veces es con la vida, o con Dios, que te cambió la vida para siempre, sin avisar.

El perdonar no tiene que ver con justificar ni con aceptar. El elegir perdonar es una convicción espiritual de saber que nos merecemos caminar más livianos. Pensamos que después de habernos quitado tanto, lo último que van a arrebatarnos es el perdón. Y no dejamos de cargar con esa piedra caliente que sólo no nos permite avanzar, recordar mejor, renacer, atesorar lo bueno, y buscar sentido en todo lo que aún nos falta vivir.

Mahatma Gandhi dice: “El débil no puede perdonar. El perdón es un atributo de los fuertes”. Elegí perdonar, no necesariamente porque el otro lo merezca, sino porque vos lo mereces.

7. Elegí una buena acción.

Elegí una. Algo que te haga sentir conectado con tu esencia. Invertí en hacer crecer tu espíritu. Busca sentido en acción. Date una cura de espiritualidad. No tiene que ver con cumplir con un mandato, o porque está escrito, o por las dudas, o a cambio de algo, o por alguna obligación. Sino para darle un mimo y fortaleza al alma.

Dice el Rebe Najman de Brazlov: “Debes ser del tipo de persona que hace de la satisfacción de sus necesidades físicas, una experiencia espiritual. Alguna gente come para tener fuerzas para estudiar Torá. Otros de mayor conciencia espiritual estudian Torá, para saber cómo comer”.

8. Elegí apoyar una causa, que te atraviese una idea.

Queremos ser más grandes de lo que somos, sólo que no sabemos cómo hacerlo. Nos empeñamos en tener y acumular cosas, pero eso no nos hace más grandes. Podemos ser más grandes en la medida que nos permitamos ser atravesados por una gran idea. No es sólo lo que hacés, sino lo que permitas que sea hecho a través tuyo.

No hay mayor cura a la soledad, mejor tratamiento a la falta de rumbo, más alta inversión en la búsqueda de sentido, ni mejor proyecto de realización personal, que el embanderarte en una causa para ayudar a otros.

Buscá una causa, un proyecto, o una persona, o un chico, y dale un poco de tu tiempo, de tu preocupación, de tu esfuerzo, de tu dinero y de tu alma. La pobreza, el hambre, la marginalidad, las adicciones, las desigualdades, la falta de derechos a las minorías, los jóvenes sin rumbo, los abuelos solos, los sin techo, la gente en la calle, los chicos sin oportunidades de estudio. Una causa. Una.

De nuestro Talmud: “El que salva a una persona, salva al mundo entero”.

Vos podés ser el que empiece este año a salvar al mundo.

9. Elegí con quiénes.

Mark Twain decía: “Dejar de fumar es fácil. Yo ya lo dejé unas 100 veces”.

Es tan difícil a veces dejar ir. Dejar partir. Y no sólo hábitos, sino ideas, sentimientos, recuerdos y personas. Es un desafío espiritual aprender a dar vuelta la página. Hay pensamientos, experiencias, ambientes y personas que son tóxicas. Que se disfrazan de lo que aparentemente queremos, y no nos permiten ni disfrutar de lo que en verdad tenemos ni de lo que somos.

Se le atribuye a Epicuro hace mas de 2300 años la frase: “No estropees lo que tienes, deseando lo que no tienes. Recuerda que lo que tienes ahora estuvo una vez entre las cosas que tanto anhelabas.”

Elegí con quiénes celebrar, reír, llorar. Con quién compartir, abrir tu corazón, o simplemente tomar un café. Elegí a los tuyos, a tu tribu, a tu gente. Elegí lo que tenés y lo que realmente querés vivir. No podés tenerlo todo porque no vas a tener nada. Dice el Talmud: “Tasafta Meruba lo Tasafta” (“Agarraste mucho, no agarraste nada”).

No dejes de ir a ningún encuentro de amigos o reunión familiar a cambio de esas cosas impostergables que jamás recordarás 48 horas después. Elegí vivir tu vida. No la de otros. Elegí las almas que te hacen sentirte un elegido.

10. Elegí buenas elecciones.

Definitivamente este año será de grandes decisiones. De importantes elecciones. Recordá que las cosas no se nos presentan tan simples en blanco o negro. Sino en una catarata interminable de grises.

Solemos pensar que habrá recompensa por elegir el bien, y lo contrario por elegir el mal. Pero la vida no es así de binaria. La llave para una buena vida es elegir buenas elecciones por sobre malas elecciones. Eso exige un balance interior para animarse a cambiar. Cambiar nuestra manera de elegir, de elegirnos.

Dijo Steve Jobs: “Cada día me miro en el espejo y me pregunto: ‘Si hoy fuese el último día de mi vida, ¿querría hacer lo que voy a hacer hoy? Si la respuesta es no durante demasiados días seguidos, sé que necesito cambiar algo’”.

Amigos queridos, amigos todos. Si fuese el último día de nuestras vidas, ¿no decidiríamos acaso elegir mejor? Seguramente elegiríamos hacer aquello que nunca hicimos, abandonar eso que sabemos que no va, y elegir qué recordar. Elegiríamos perdonar, abrazarnos a nuestras ideas, y especialmente abrazar y elegir a los nuestros. Empezar hoy con esta ruta será la forma de aprovechar cada día y, entonces, elegir ser jóvenes para siempre.

Rabino Alejandro Avruj
Rabino de la Comunidad Amijai y presidente de la Asamblea Rabínica Latinoamericana del Movimiento Masorti

 

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